I got an email from a friend who said she felt jealous reading my blog because of how warm and wonderful our family Thanksgiving sounded. 5 minutes before I read her message, I saw a copy of a beautful book made by this very same friend for her father’s 85th birthday, filled with quotations from the entire family about wonderful memories shared over a lifetime. Reading this book, I felt jealous of HER family.
Classic, isn’t it?
Does anyone out there belong to a functional family? I don’t think there’s any such thing. Because a family is a group of human beings, who by definition, are imperfect. Somewhere along the line things are going to go wrong. Someone is going to get offended or hurt or angry. You can count on it.
My family members have been great sports about me spilling secrets on the internet, even though I didn’t warn anyone about my blog ahead of time. And even though I’m always completely honest here (other than occasional exaggerations about how much chocolate I eat –probably MORE than you think, not less) I really can’t promise full disclosure all the time. Sometimes when I sit down to write my post, something is on my mind involving someone I love and I can’t write about it. In fact I often complain to V that I can’t use my best material.
But tonight I can. V fell asleep way before I thought about what to write, and hopefully he’ll be ok that I mention this because it involves his side of the family.
Tonight was V’s brother’s birthday, and we went over to their house. We even got dinner this time. And birthday cake. And the best gift of the night was when out of the blue, V’s brother took the opportunity to tell V something beautiful and personal and loving–something to clear up and wipe away a long-ago hurt. It was an experience none of us will ever forget–someone speaking with honesty straight from the heart, with no motivation other than love.
It makes a difference. And it proves that sometimes, families really are functional after all.