Driving from Monterey to Los Angeles and back—I’ve done this round trip countless times. Yet it felt different somehow.
On the way home, my CD player breaks a few miles out of L.A. In the middle of the state, there isn’t much on the radio that isn’t religious or Spanish—so I have almost 5 hours—alone with my thoughts.
The road is mostly straight but my mind keeps going around in circles. As if everything has come full circle. Kids. Relationships. Life. Even the trip itself.
It’s been 15 years since I moved the kids from Los Angeles to Carmel, and started regular runs to take them back down during vacations. I loved taking a break, going alone to L.A. where the kids would be with their dad and I could spend time with friends I missed.
We were the 3 musketeers, the kids strapped into the car, a captive audence to sing along to the Beatles, Bob Dylan, and Broadway show tunes. In return they got to stop at their favorite places for diversion along Highway 101—the House of Bread in San Luis Obispo, In and Out Burger, and Santa’s Village.
We had one last tradition on the ride home. Always the same scene, as familiar as a bedtime ritual. Daniel would suddenly announce he had to pee right that minute. He always did this at the same place, in the middle of nowhere in the Salinas valley farmland. I’d pull off the road at the same exit, and we’d stop for him to pee, always by the same tree.
I don’t go often to L.A. anymore; but when I do, everything is different. This time, Daniel comes down with me but we drive by his tree without a glance. There’s no need for diversion—so we don’t even take the same route. We skip the House of Bread and Santa’s village on the 101 and take the 5, boring but faster. Daniel plays whatever music is mutually acceptable on his ipod–which doesn’t seem to include Broadway show tunes.
Of course the biggest change that’s come around is that Alli and Daniel go to L.A. themselves. If I go at all, the drive is like it was on my way home. I’m driving an empty car, back to an empty nest.
Since Daniel left for college, he’s been urging me to get a dog. I’m obsessed attached to Peppy, who was always his cat. Now she’s apparently mine, yet another thing that’s come full circle.
Even with Peppy, Daniel thinks I’d like having a dog, a companion to take along on trips, like the one to LA. So far I’ve resisted. On the long ride home, I think he might have a point.
If I had a dog, I could stop and he could pee by Daniel’s tree. Maybe I could even train him to bark to Broadway show tunes.
A half hour before I get home, I have to drive right past the local SPCA. I don’t stop, but I do slow down, and think about it.
I’ve been thinking the same thing. I have one kid left at home, but when she’s gone I need to have someone there to listen to me. And I will be talking out loud, whether someone’s here or not.
If you get a big dog, she could share the driving!
Definite advantages. I think a dog would listen to me far more than my kids ever did. And a dog at the wheel can’t make me more nervous than I was when my kids were learning how to drive.
i hate route 5 / faster yes, but a lot of the trip is spent thinking how close i was getting to my destination. we shouldn’t rush anymore. this is the trip. i still have a “senior to be” at home and, also have a dog. lulu (the dg) is blind but will happily listen to me ramble on and on. My 17 yr old barely tunes into the second sentence. Guess who gets the ‘treats’ at night?
Darryle,
Amy has been tellng me the exact same thing for months, even sending me pictures of lonely doggies. I, too, slow down near the SPCA, but have not gone in. Once you go in, you are a goner.
How would my 13 year old cat adjust to new love in the house?
You are both hilarious. M.E.– lucky you have a potential audience of two–at least your dog is blind and not deaf.
And Iris I have the same issue with the cat adjusting to a sibling of a different species. Last time I tried that was bringing home a brother when Alli wanted a sister.
Hi Darryle,
Enjoying your blog.
May need some input from you. We are considering a December trip to California. We want to drive the Pacific Coast Highway either from SF to LA or reverse. Have any suggestions?
Hi Darryle,
Enjoying your blog.
May need some input from you. We are considering a December trip to California. We want to drive the Pacific Coast Highway either from SF to LA or reverse. Have any suggestions?
I have heard not to go too late into Dec. because of the rain and mudslides.
Thanks,
Andi
Please don’t get a dog!!!I am sorry to say after watching my mom, it takes a lot of work!! I don’t think you are a dog person, Aunt Darryle!!!
If you’re thinking about getting a dog, go to petfinder.com, where you can see pets (dogs, cats, horses, etc.) listed around your area first & then expanding outward. You can look by breed, age, or m/f. Many purebred pets are available in local shelters & rescues, also.
In Monterey County, in addition to the SPCA, there is Animal Friends Rescue Project in PG, which rescues pets from primarily the Salinas and County shelters. AFRP is the only local agency covering the surgeries and medical needs of shelter animals, including those hit by cars.
Also, at the AFRP website (animalfriendsrescue.org), there are links to other local shelters and rescues’ websites & you can see photos of all available pets. The Salinas and Monterey County shelters are both on the same road off of Hwy 68, so come and see twice as many dogs!
After the last two comments, now I don’t know what to think.
I so appreciate all of your information, Mary—but apparently Leah thinks I’m not a dog person. I used to be—until we got Peppy.