Just. In. Case.
The 3 words most used by Jewish mothers.
The 3 words their kids least want to hear.
Daniel was packing up for his semester abroad. According to airline regulations, his suitcase can’t weigh over 50 pounds—which forces him to weigh priorities.
So he makes a colossal mistake and asks me if I would help him organize for Buenos Aires.
Daniel is thinking shopping: how many pairs of shoes to bring vs. how many he will buy.
I have a different agenda.
For me this is an opportunity to open a line of conversation Daniel will wish never started…..that ends with a trip to Target and a call to a doctor and an addition to his luggage—– an emergency medical kit that I insist suggest Daniel assemble—-containing everything anyone could possibly need from A (Afrin nasal spray) ….to Z (Zithromax Z- pack for a full course of antibiotics).
As a good son, he’s a good sport, though he refused a few of my suggestions. Like— I thought it wouldn’t hurt to bring along an inhaler—although statistically there’s very little likelihood he would have an asthma attack —since he doesn’t have asthma.
He also rejected a bottle of Tecnu. Though he’ll be in a totally urban environment, how can I be sure he won’t be exposed to poison oak? You never know. (3 more words over-used by Jewish mothers.)
Remember, just knowing there are hospitals in Buenos Aires doesn’t provide comfort to a Jewish mother….except maybe the Jewish mothers who live in Buenos Aires.
And though I realize Argentina is a large country where there’s a reasonable chance of finding a band-aid, I made Daniel pack some anyway—-that’s a key part of a Jewish mother’s strategy: Taking something with you is the best way to insure you’ll never need it.
In the end Daniel’s suitcase came in weighing just under 50 pounds…. at least 30 pounds of it being medication……Just. In. Case.
This post is #4 in a sporadic series I call “Uncontrollable Mothering.” For other examples, click here.
It has been scientifically proven that Jewish mothers are genetically identical to Italian mothers. And being one myself, I fully endorse that theory. So since a large percentage of the Argentine population has Italian origins, and considering Buenos Aires is one of the world’s greatest Jewish communities, with an estimated Jewish population of over 250,000 I’d say Daniel will be OK. The 30 lbs of medical stuff sounds totally reasonable, I would have done the same (if not worse). After all, when kids travel abroad, you never know.
Thank you! You just made me feel SO much better about myself!
I also didn’t realize so many Italians settled in ARgentina–
BTW– though I always tend to think Jewish mothers get the gold medal for worrying, I will broaden my thinking to include Italian mothers, too…
I think that might be a Catholic mother phrase too. I heard that a lot growing up…. I also heard, “I’m not mad, just disappointed” a lot too. Catholics are really good with the guilt thing.
Hope you son has a fantastic time abroad! He’ll learn a ton!
Or Cuban mothers- my wife any time my kids have a girlfriend, the first question was- Is she Cuban?. Darryle, my wife slept in Boys Scouts retreat with my sons, so mothers are mothers, some have a cure for everything in chicken soup, others in plate of spaghetti and others in a Cuban Sandwich.
I’m thinking it’s pretty universal for all mothers.
And wow, for a kid, hearing that “disappointment” thing really hurts. Since Jewish mothers are known for the guilt thing, that is one thing I’ve tried really hard not to do—I’m not sure my kids would say I’ve always succeeded.
Thank u.
Hilarious and so true!
She slept in Boy Scouts retreats??? And I thought I was over the top—I love that! Also love your last line—so many mothers try to cure everything with food. Of course I still think the best cure is chocolate.
Thank u—and thanks for stopping by.
I’m on your side! I never leave the house w/ my kids w/out band aids and we never go on vacations without inhalers (even though my boys have not needed inhalers since they were babies. But you know…Just…In…Case!
Oy vey, what we go through as mothers!
I love this article! It homes, right on target as I plan a last minute trip back east. I’m my own Jewish mother, my mom always
tells me not to take so much, I’ve got the meds from A-Z,
plus an outfit for every occassion (never know when you’ll be invited to the opera in NY, or to a fancy party, lol, or sit next
to a potential job lead/beau on the plane!
Oy vey is right. And I’m on your side, too, just seeing the name of your blog–Create a balance–something all mothers can use –all the time. Thanks for commenting.
You sound just like me—the medication is just a drop in the bucket compared to the amount of clothing I pack. And my daughter is even worse. When she goes away for a weekend, she brings everything she owns:
http://blog.darrylepollack.com/2008/09/parental-baggage/
Probably it’s due to her childhood memories.
My ex-husband read this post and reminded me that when we took our first plane trip with her, she was 3 months old and we were going to Manhattan—not a desert island. Still I packed enough diapers to last a week.
Have a great trip!
I love it. I uesd to tease my Jewish mother for worrying when my brother was out late. He was notoriously forgetful and nothing ever happened to him even when he was late, so I was always telling her not to worry. Now I understand…and now my husband teases me for worrying when he and the boys are later than I expect them getting home. Although I have to say my parents are the one who tease me for packing too much 🙂
Guess there is a little Jewish mother in all of us. Isn’t it amazing how the way you felt before kids—completely changes afterwards??
As for the packing, I tease Alli about it but then I do the same thing myself.
I spent £200 in Boots the Chemist before my daughter went to Uganda for 18 months. I sent her with sterile hypodermic needles in case she needed an injection (Uganda had one of the highest rates of AIDS in the world). Because she was going with the VSO (the British equivalent of the Peace Corps only 10 times more rational and useful) she was allowed two suitcases of 50 lbs each. It turned out it was a special deal, known as a “missionary fare” — well that is old days Brit…
Between the hypopdermic needles and the idea of 18 months in Uganda—I would be a total wreck. You Brits are tough. Glad I know she is back safe. What adventure is she up to these days?