The Pilgrims couldn’t possibly predict that such a wonderful holiday can turn into such a headache. I don’t mean cooking and Thanksgiving disasters, I mean the stuff-ing that’s not related to food….but related to us: families. And the most common lament I hear lately: although holidays bring families together, they also tear families apart.
We live far away; we’re married with two sets of in-laws; we’re divorced. Families are already separated physically—so when you add in the emotional complications, it can leave us struggling to find solutions.
I’ve heard lots of answers—scheduling Thanksgiving dinner at a different time of year; alternating years with different sides of the family; taking turns hosting the meal. But no matter how creative you get, it’s complicated– because people are complicated and nothing is more complicated than family relationships. Oy.
I don’t remember much about Thanksgiving when I was a child. It was so simple: I showed up; and I over-ate. It makes me long for the days when the only negative about Thanksgiving was indigestion.
Living so far from my relatives, and being divorced, holiday times have always been a challenge. I’ve flown across the country for most Thanksgivings with my side of the family as a family tradition . But once the kids are not kids but adults leading their own lives, Thanksgiving and holidays get trickier –when obligations like college and work and their own families are added into the mix.
For me the choice is clear; I go where my kids are. I only have two; and so far they manage to be in the same place at the same time. So I’m going again to my ex-husband’s side of the family. I’m just hoping this year they weigh only the turkey– and not the people.
But I’m still left wishing I could clone myself and eat my sister’s pies.
Come to think about it, I figured out a solution a few years ago. It allows me to be in both places; avoids the crush at airports, and as a bonus, it’s guaranteed to be diet-proof.
So if you want to be in two places at once, and be the life of the party: Go cardboard. Be thankful you have someplace to go at all. And happy travels to everyone.
Jody says
I’m at my ex-husband’s too, but, then, it’s HIS girlfriend who led me to your blog. It’s all good. (Or we work to make it so!)
Jody
Darryle Pollack says
I love it—isn’t life amazingly unpredictable? Who could imagine–or make up this stuff? Happy Thanksgiving!